Friends

I hope you have the sheer luxury of having a friend in your life.  And I am not talking about social media friends.

A simple statement kind of sums a friend up; a person with whom one has a bond of mutual affection.

Looking back at all the chapters that have been written of my life (in my mind), I see some things as a constant familiarity in my life.

That of a friend or friends.

Some of my friends have been in my life since the young adolescent age of 14.  And wonderfully, some of them are still in my life.

Not all friends make it.  Not all friendships survive.

And not always because of fallouts.  Some simply drift out of sight, some are consciously cut, and some hang out in the outer circle of connections, never really leaving, never really engaged.

They say if you can count your friends on one hand you’re doing well.  And when I was young, I didn’t really understand that because I had lots of friends.  I was in a girl gang and so sometimes there was a bunch of us.  More than one hand’s worth.

But now, I see what that phrase really means.

It means you meet a lot of people in your life.  And not everyone hangs around.

Sometimes the people on the one hand are the people you least expect to be there and may have even thought they would never be there.

There are those that step in, and those that step out.

The biggest shakeups come when there is or has been a significant change happen and these moments can be a change maker for friendships.  Some can handle it, others cannot.

I suppose the point is to not take any of it personally.  Friendship is a gift.  And yet friendship is very personal.  It is based on who you are.  But change shifts the dynamics and at times some friendships cannot be sustained.

It is given and then it can be taken away.

At choice! Or not it seems sometimes.

The one thing I love about getting older and maturity is the clarity of definitions.  Wisdom defines.

It defines what’s important and what’s not.

Life has a way of reminding you; what is it that you want to show up in your life.

For me, it’s the friendships that value me and I value them.  The friendships mean there is a connection and a caring that is more than just words.

I hope you have a handful of friends – and if you have more congratulations!

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